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When Bullying Takes a Toll on Youth Mental Health

By the time Brian was 12, bullying at school had become serious enough that he started running away from school to avoid the students who were hurting him. Brian came to Western Youth Services with depression, anxiety and autism, and his mother, Maddison, reached out for counseling and guidance. As Brian and his therapist talked more about what was happening, it became clear that the stress was affecting the rest of the family, too. Maddison and both of Brian’s sisters were experiencing anxiety, and managing everything had become difficult for her to handle on her own.

Brian’s experience is one example of why bullying deserves attention beyond what happens in the classroom. Bullying can affect a child’s mental health, relationships, behavior and sense of safety, and the effects can continue long after an incident takes place. October is National Bullying Prevention Month, an opportunity to talk about these effects, recognize the signs that a child may be struggling and consider what families, schools and communities can do to help.

The Connection Between Bullying And Mental Health

Bullying can take many forms, including physical aggression, hurtful comments, rumors, social exclusion and behavior that happens through phones or online platforms. Whatever form it takes, the experience can leave a child feeling like they have nowhere to escape it.

PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center reports that 19.2% of students say they’ve been bullied. The rate is higher among middle school students, with 26.1% reporting that they’ve been bullied compared with 14.6% of high school students. Among students who reported being bullied, 41.3% believed the bullying would happen again.

CDC data also shows how bullying can affect mental health. Between July 2021 and December 2023, 34% of teenagers ages 12 to 17 reported being bullied during the previous year. Teenagers who had experienced bullying were nearly twice as likely to report symptoms of anxiety or depression compared with those who hadn’t been bullied.

These numbers don’t mean every child who experiences bullying will develop a mental health condition. But they do show why changes in mood, behavior, school attendance or relationships shouldn’t be ignored.

Signs A Child May Be Struggling

Not every child will tell a caregiver they’re being bullied. Embarrassment, fear of making the situation worse or uncertainty about how to explain what’s happening can all make it harder to speak up.

The Child Mind Institute notes that bullying often involves a power difference, repeated behavior and harm to a child’s well-being or ability to function. Caregivers may notice:

  • Frequent headaches, stomachaches or other physical complaints
  • Suddenly not wanting to go to school or participate in activities
  • Increased irritability, anxiety, sadness or withdrawal
  • Changes in sleep, including nightmares or trouble sleeping
  • Missing, damaged or unexplained belongings
  • Changes in friendships or social activities
  • Avoiding a phone, computer or particular apps
  • Strong emotional reactions to texts, notifications or online interactions

None of these signs automatically means a child is being bullied. They can point to other challenges, too. A calm conversation can give caregivers a better idea of what’s happening instead of trying to piece everything together from the outside.

What Caregivers Can Do

The instinct to immediately fix the situation can be strong when a child is being bullied. Listening, taking the child seriously and reminding them that the bullying isn’t their fault can be more beneficial than jumping straight to a solution.

StopBullying.gov recommends listening without blame, supporting the child and working with appropriate adults to address the situation. Telling a child to ignore bullying or fight back can put even more responsibility on them. Adults have a role in creating a safer environment and responding to the behavior.

Caregivers can also:

  • Ask what would make them feel safer. A child may know which adult they trust or what kind of support they want from home or school.
  • Document what’s happening. Keep track of dates, incidents and school communications. Save relevant messages or screenshots when cyberbullying is involved.
  • Work with the school. Teachers, counselors, administrators and other trusted adults can look for patterns and determine how to respond.
  • Help them stay involved. Friends, activities and hobbies can give children a sense of belonging outside of the bullying experience.
  • Pay attention to mental health. Increasing anxiety, depression, withdrawal or school avoidance may be signs that additional care is needed.

These steps are part of youth bullying prevention, where communication, relationships and early intervention matter alongside a school’s formal response.

Prevention Doesn’t End In October

National Bullying Prevention Month was established by PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center in 2006 and became a month-long campaign in 2010. October creates an opportunity to have conversations that might otherwise be overlooked, but the work of preventing and responding to bullying needs to continue throughout the year.

Schools, caregivers, mental health professionals and community organizations all have a role to play. Open communication, positive relationships, activities that give children a sense of belonging and clear ways to ask for help can all strengthen youth mental health and bullying prevention efforts.

When The Whole Family Needs Support

Maddison’s experience also shows why looking beyond one child’s immediate concern can make a difference. Brian needed help dealing with what was happening at school, but his experience was affecting the entire family. Once WYS understood what everyone was carrying, the family could start receiving assistance.

Western Youth Services’ One Door Any Door™ gives children, teens and families in Orange County a starting point when they’re looking for mental health resources. Through one entry point, families can find services within WYS and its collaborative network while navigating barriers to care.

Care can look different from one family to the next. Counseling may be the starting point for one child, while another family may need school-based services, guidance for caregivers, care coordination or a referral to a community provider. WYS works with families to find services that best fit their needs.

Giving Professionals More Tools To Respond

Bullying prevention also depends on the adults who interact with children every day. Teachers, school staff, counselors, healthcare providers and community organizations need to recognize changes in behavior, understand how bullying can affect mental health and know how to respond without placing blame on the child.

CDC research found that teenagers with a developmental disability were more likely to experience bullying than teenagers without a developmental disability, with rates of 44.4% compared with 31.3%. Recognizing those increased risks can help professionals respond earlier and guide families in the right direction.

Western Youth Services’ Behavioral Health & Wellness Training gives schools, agencies, healthcare providers and community organizations practical tools to build these skills. Training topics include Bullying Prevention & Intervention, School Avoidance & Anxiety, Family Engagement, Internet & Social Media Safety and Having Difficult Conversations. WYS also offers customized training for organizations that want to address specific needs within their communities.

These youth mental health and bullying prevention programs equip professionals to recognize concerns, respond thoughtfully and help families find additional mental health resources when needed.

Resources For Caregivers And Communities

These organizations offer information and guidance for caregivers, educators, schools and communities:

A mental health professional, school counselor, pediatrician or community provider can also help caregivers decide what path makes the most sense for their child and family.

Moving Forward

Bullying can affect how a child feels about school, friendships and themselves. Early recognition and support can make a difference as children and families work through what’s happening, even when the situation feels overwhelming.

If you’re concerned about how bullying is affecting a child or teen in your life, Western Youth Services is here to help. Our team provides mental health services and care coordination for children, teens and families throughout Orange County, with services tailored to each family’s needs.

Get in touch with Western Youth Services to learn more about available care and mental health resources. Visit westernyouthservices.org or contact our team to take the next step.

Western Youth Services works hard to protect the privacy of the children we help. As such, the names of our clients are changed.

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